I Weep

for all that has been
broken
forgotten
repressed
suppressed

in not remembering

these losses distort
perception

resulting in
anger
righteousness
a need for control

to make things
‘feel’ safe

I reflect

what was the moment
of disconnection

knowing something was wrong

how do we find
truth
ruth

venturing into
the murky layers
of forgotten memories

back to a place inside
when there was
no choice

to ensure
survival

imperative
to construct
to make sense of

a reality that

still unconsciously
demands
reinforces

its beliefs and values

a part
a structure
a pattern

created by necessity

adapting

its valiant effort
to maintain safety
in the external holding environment

I weep 

for all the lost years
searching for
love respect dignity

life begins with love

not necessarily meaning
a parent’s  definition of love

as they may hold a
spoken or unspoken agenda
current and ancestral wounds
a predetermined overlay

or no plan

consciously and unconsciously
impacting new life

so where does love begin
I ask myself

I believe
each new being
breathing into life

is here

to
remind parents
open their hearts
grow

in relationship

softening yet strengthening
their bond

creating a space for
potential healing
unexpected miracles

love
is always here

our soul
yearning for wholeness

searches for
a returning to

light before thought
quiet before action
oneness before separation

birth and death
meet in essence

we become peace

we are love

I weep

Ruth Roberts